Let’s be honest; we don’t always say exactly what we mean. This is typical for most humans, but sometimes especially for athletes. We tend to say what we want to tell ourselves, to make the challenge ahead of him seem like not a big deal.
Greenville Running Company released a funny and realistic post about “10 Things Trail Runners Say Versus What They Really Mean” by Brendan Davies 2016 Australian Male Ultra Runner of the Year, that left us nodding and laughing in agreement.
- “I’ve hardly trained, so I’m taking it easy.”
Can you count on two hands how many times you’ve said this one? Probably not. What we really mean is, “I’ve been training the house down, and as soon as that gun goes off, you’ll be seeing the soles of my trail running shoes and eating my dust!”
- “I’ll be alright; I won’t get lost.”
This really means, “I am God’s gift to navigation and have a built in GPS and can get myself out of any spot.” So, the next time you hear someone say this, make sure they don’t leave without a map or a phone.
- “The snake/bear/hornet/lion was this big!!”
This means that the snake was a lizard, the bear a wombat, the hornet a bee, and the lion was a domestic cat.
- “Hey come for a run, all you need is a pair of shoes.”
This is just a lie. Your average trail runner looks more like they are about to go camping rather than a couple hour run, and they always have the newest runner’s gadget.
- “It’s not hilly; it’s just undulating.”
If you say that in front of a new runner, they will quickly put you back in your place.
- “Running in the rain is so lovely.”
We are trail runners, and we will never let anyone know that running in the rain is actually wet, cold, and sometimes miserable.
- “100 miles isn’t that far.”
Usually, by mile 75, you are crumpled over in the fetal position wrapped in an emergency blanket. Way to have a positive attitude though.
- “I just did a 2.5 hour run with 2,000M of vertical.”
This means you had a nice 1-hour easy run that included some a couple of stair climbs. Probably didn’t even make it to the trails.
- “We’re almost at the peak!”
Having a positive friend is nice, but when this is heard everyone is probably thinking, “You sadistic friend. We’ve been hiking up this climb for 2hrs, and I know we’re not even halfway to the top!”
- “You didn’t happen to bring some Vaseline did you?”
Sometimes you just got to do, what you got to do. This means, “My (insert: sweaty body part) is on fire, and I need some relief, brother!”